All I'm missing is brown, crooked teeth, pigtails and overalls. OH, and body odor.
HOW-DEE! Well despite the weather bein' hotter and drier than a popcorn fart, it was a good weekend for gopher huntin'. These dadgum varmints are taking over my garden so I had to get down right rough. They recenly declared war by eatin' the leaves off plants around these parts. THIS WILL NOT DO. So I loaded up my shotgun and waited all night for one of these little devils to stick his pink little nose up out of the ground and then KABLOOEY!!!
Har. Had you goin', didn't I?
But I did catch me a nice sized gopher. Probably a 6-incher. Isn't he a beaut? No good for eatin', though. Would have had to be at least an 8er to be any good for that. Cuz then you don't get so many bones, you know? Ain't nothin' worse than havin' to pick out the bones from a delicious gopher leg.
Okay that's enough. I'm making myself sick. And I just got over food poisoning or salmonella or the stomach flu. I'm not sure which but WHEW-EE, it was unpleasant, to say the least. But on the bright side, it made me finally reach my weight-loss goal. For all of about one hour, until I ate again. Now I'm back to normal. Plus I almost had a heart attack thinking that I wouldn't be able to do my play this weekend. But as of this morning, I can actually stand up straight and all systems are funtioning halfway normal.
Well hopefully the underground mongrels in my back yard will take the hint that they are no longer welcome to burrow in unclaimed territory. Until they understand there will be many more traps filled with gopher guts.
I think I should work on a gopher skinned hat. That would go nicely with my gettup, don't you think??
girls camp mail boxes
10 years ago
5 comments:
Nice catch! Great job getting to your weight loss goal! That was fast! And good luck with your play this weekend. I know you'll do great.
That THING looks nasty! You're quite the wildlife hunter. Maybe you should start a show and make millions!
Our neighbors have a garden in the side yard that we share. One day last summer we saw a rat,(not a field mouse as Wes will claim, because I saw it's big, nasty tail) rummaging around in it. I think now I'm afraid to have a garden as it brings about these disgusting varments(sp). How do you even go about keeping these critters out?
Wow I always knew you were my hero, but this just solidifies it. You rock. That thing is disgusting. I love your expression! You would have been an awesome pioneer! Good luck with the play, I can't wait to hear all about it! I am with you in spirit!
Hayley!!!
So I just ran into your blog again... And you're freakin hillarious! How are you? Anyway I just set up a blog for us, but its not as exciting as yours :-) We're kinda boring but I'm feeling inspired by reading yours.... Be our friend smannings.blogspot. Ttyl.
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